Wednesday, July 16, 2008

"Little things"

Wyatt 4 days old

Last night Hayley kept waking up and crying. She has allergies or a cold. She seemed a little warm so I decided to take her temperature. As I got the thermometer out the realization came to me that the last time I used this was for Wyatt the weekend before he died. All the memories of that weekend came back to me. His sweet little ear was the last thing that had touched this thermometer. I miss him so much.


This morning Hayley was playing with the diaper bag we had taken with us to the hospital. I thought I had cleaned everything out of it but she brought me the consecrated oil that Derek had used for the blessings he gave Wyatt. This also brought back all those memories of his last week on this earth. This is so much harder than I ever imagined. Little things will just come to me and a flood of memories take over and I just have to cry. Oh, how I miss my baby.

6 comments:

Jon and Jessica Bryant said...

Your amazing. These little things keep you close to Wyatt and will continue forever. You know I keep thinking, Great Grandma is in heaven with Wyatt watching out for you. She lost Joanne and knows what you are going through as well. You have so many people on both sides of the veil here to help you and support you with everything you go through. I hope you know you and your family are loved. We are here for you and love you!

Jill said...

Those memories of Wyatt are timeless and precious. Even though all of those raw emotions come flooding back often, it's ok that you have to cry. Just remember that it IS part of your healing (no matter what others say). We're all for you to help in that healing. ALL of us!

neener said...

Finding lost treasures always brings back many memories.... I am so greatful for them. I have been noticing certain smells lately that have effected us and still every now and then we run across a swab or medicine that was last used by T and we all shed a tear or two. Their memories are priceless and I am greatful for them everyday. Tears and all, they will keep us close to our angels.

Natalie said...

Just keep feeling what you feel and I'll just keep learning from you. I'm sure things will always remind you of him but in a way that is a good thing because then you will truly, really never forget him. Love you!

Jenna said...

Oh I am so sad for you right now. I don't even know you but I hurt for you. I pray you will feel some more comfort. I wish so bad I could take this away from you. YOu are so amazing though and have strengthened me and my testimony. Wyatt is such a handsome little guy, and I know he is with you right now.

gcashton said...

This is just so hard, Andrea. All of it. The little things are enormous--everyday reminders of your loss. I love your little Wyatt. I am crying with you.